Remember the days when guys called you on the phone to ask you out on a date?
Remember when you had to make a plan and stick to it? As in, you had to call the girl and set a location and then print out Mapquest directions to get you there?
Remember when there wasn’t texting and apps and swiping left and swiping right and you had to meet the person IRL BEFORE you found out anything about that person?
It was in 1997 and I was 15 years old.
This blog is not some wishful thinking, throwback, “oh-those-were-the-days” type blog.
It’s the opposite, in fact.
The times are changing, and we all need to be okay with that.
Many guys don’t call anymore.
Many people, single, married, divorced and in-between don’t even like to talk on the phone.
And when I got that see-through landline phone on my 13th birthday, the one you plugged into a jack in your bedroom and couldn’t travel more than two feet or you’d stretch the cord too far, I felt like the luckiest teenager on Earth.
Today, a 13 year-old gets a phone for her birthday and she wouldn’t even know what it was or what the hell to do with it. She’d probably put it in some millennial museum to be marveled at.
Maybe some women still need that phone call. That voice recognition, that old school-ness. And, that’s okay.
But, I don’t. I don’t need that at all.
Guys, let me tell you what I do need, though:
I need you to show up for that date like you said you would.
I need you to be respectful of me, and you’ll get that respect in return.
I need you to not cheat on me if we enter into something that we decide is exclusivity.
I need you to ask me about my job.
I need you to ask me about my day.
I need you to at least be courteous to my friends. Ya don’t gotta like em, but you do need to be some semblance of nice to them.
I need you to make me feel safe.
I need you to like me.
And, if you don’t like me, I need you tell me sooner, rather than later.
I need you to make a plan and stick to it.
I need you not to be a flake. I have enough of those in my life.
I need you to be fun.
I need you to not call me crazy.
Even if you think I’m acting crazy.
Even if I am crazy.
I need you to want me.
I need you to find me sexy and beautiful and pretty and cute.
I need you to call me out if I do something wrong.
Okay, WHEN I do something wrong.
I need you to teach me something.
I need you to be strong.
I need you to remember your manners.
I need you to be interested in my life, and I’ll be interested in yours.
I need you to be lots of fun.
I need to go on adventures with you.
I need you to introduce me to your friends and your family, if it comes to that.
I need you to be open-minded, even if my views are different than yours.
I need you to try not to let me down.
And I will understand if you do, because we’re all just human.
I need you to challenge me.
I need you to have a sex drive.
I need you to have passion.
I need you to be responsible.
I need you to take an interest in the things I’m interested in, or at least pretend to.
And be interesting.
I need you to not ignore me.
I need you to be understanding
Really, I just need you to be nice to me.
I don’t need you to call me.