I started thinking a lot about courage, about what it really meant after I watched Brene Brown’s TED talk on vulnerability. If you have not seen it, stop what you are doing and watch NOW.
Mind blowingly gorgeous, right?
(I am on a mission to get her for a Manifestation Q&A.)
Brene says “ Courage, the original definition of courage, when it first came into the English language – it’s from the Latin word cor, meaning heart – and the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart. And so these folks had, very simply, the courage to be imperfect. They had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others, because, as it turns out, we can’t practice compassion with other people if we can’t treat ourselves kindly. And the last was they had connection, and — this was the hard part – as a result of authenticity, they were willing to let go of who they thought they should bein order to be who they were, which you have to absolutely do that for connection.“
There it is! The courage to be imperfect.
I was telling my class on Saturday just before I had them write for 3 minutes straight about courage, that I think people grossly underestimate themselves when it comes to courage. You do not have to jump from a plane with a parachute to be courageous.
I look at the people on my last retreat. One girl came all the way from Amsterdam, alone. All the way to Mexico with a group she didn’t know, having never done yoga in her life and leaving her children back home. That’s courage to me, in my little Jen Book Of Courage. And you know, she had the courage to be imperfect and ask for private help from me with the poses. She had the courage to sit out and watch at times. She had the courage to make new friends and be vulnerable. My sister had the courage to leave two kids at home (one who has special needs and a very strict regimen) and take a week just for herself. Something she had never ever done in her life.
Today, she is signing up for a yoga teacher training in Atlanta after allowing herself that week retreat in Mexico, that was a gift just for her. She connected to what inspired her and renewed her sense of courage and came home ready to take on the world.
It took courage for me to admit my hearing loss. At first, I was mortified and felt less than a human being. I was afraid I would be alone in the world on an island of silence in a sea of noise.
I started to tell the story of who I was with my own heart and much to my delight, I ended up inspiring people and encouraging others to be vulnerable and open.
It took courage for me to talk openly about my history with a severe eating disorder. It also held me accountable.
It even took courage to start my Karaoke Yoga Classes. To get up there and sing badly in front of all my students and be silly and free so I could encourage them to do the same.
When my dad died I told myself not to cry. I held it in for years. I literally would bit my lip and say “Don’t cry. Be strong. Be courageous.”
I was 8.
Unfortunately I thought that was the courageous thing to do. To be brave like an adult and hold it in and move on and get on with my life. To not be affected and most certainly never ever be vulnerable. Especially not in front of other people. Gasp!
It took many years for me to develop the courage to show emotion in front of other people. I had a very hard time as an actor being vulnerable or crying because of all the years I spent stifling that part of me. It was like a piece had broken and the clock was missing a second hand, the doll had lost it’s head, the flower was without it’s color.
Once I finally opened up I realized that it was my courage and that very vulnerability which drew others to me, and get this, which allowed me to make money. The thing i had stifled and been ashamed of, was now my source of income and my bliss. Is it my bliss not being able to hear well? No way!
It is my bliss being able to share and talk and teach and take people on a journey where they can discover what courage means for them.
A woman came up to me Thursday after my Equinox class who told me she just signed up to go back to school so she could become a clinical psychologist. She is 60. That, Dear Manifesters, is what courage also looks like.
Doing something that society may have told you that you are too old for. Or too young for. Doing something because it is what you want to do rather than what anyone else asks of you. That is not to say we act purely from our own needs all the time with no consideration for others or our family. It is to say that we must do what we feel is our dharma, or what makes us come alive despite what may seem like a very valid excuse as not to do that very thing.
Courage has so many meanings. Come to class this week and we will explore. Add your comment below as to what courage means to you. Where you have demonstrated courage in your life. Where you could use a little courage.
If you want a “Courage” tattoo please contact me and I will get you one from Conscious Ink or go directly to them.
Here are some suggestions as to how you can comment below:
It took courage for me to __________ despite ____________.
I have the courage to say “I love __________.”
When ________ happened I found I had courage I didn’t know I had.
I have the courage to ask for help with ________________.
I have the courage to admit to myself that I really want ______________.
I have the courage to accept ___________________.
I have the courage to forgive _______________.
I have the courage to go after my dream of ___________.
Lions and Tiger and Bears. Oh My,www.jenniferpastiloff.com www.manifestationyoga.com @manifestyogajen
I am a lover of life, laughter, poetry, yoga and a really good glass of wine. I created Manifestation Yoga, which is all about causing serious breakthroughs in your life without being too serious. My rule of “If you fall you must laugh and take down your neighbor” is Strictly enforced! I teach all over Los Angeles and also in Philadelphia & NJ at Dhyana Yoga. I travel the world teaching workshops and leading retreats. My nephew Blaise was recently diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder called Prader Wille Syndrome (PWS) which prompted me to start GAME Yoga. Gifts And Miracles Everyday: Free Yoga for Kids w/ Special Needs. It’s also a really good excuse for me to be around kids whom I generally loved more than the average adult. I am also a poet, and in the process of writing a book. I firmly believe that you can manifest whatever it is you want in your life. I am partially deaf and wear hearing aids. I spent 13 years working in the same restaurant and I believe that everyone should have a job in the service industry at least once in their life. It’s good for the soul. www.jenniferpastiloff.com www.manifestationyoga.com