Tales of a Newly
wed Single Gal
When you get married, you think you have it all planned out. You have a vision for how the rest of your lives will play out down to the most miniscule details. Well, I did. How quickly things can change. Yes, I am thirty and getting a d-i-v-o-r-c-e. (I like to spell it out. I still haven’t been able to actually say the word. I’ll get there eventually.)
They call it a “mini-marriage” and apparently they’re all the rage in this country. By definition, a mini-marriage is a marriage that lasts only a few years and ends before the couple has children. Who knew I was so trendy? All joking aside, I know a handful of fabulous, thirty-something’s who are going through the same thing. If you had asked me to write about this even three months ago my response would have been, “No thanks, but leave a bottle of wine at the door on your way out.” Now I’m ready, willing and able to talk as I navigate through my new life.
I started dating my ex when I was 23 years old. In the 7 years we were together (2 of them married), we lived through a lifetime of experiences. We traveled, have great families, loved our jobs, and got the perfect dog to complement our seemingly perfect life. Chloe is still perfect in every way. At least one thing was. In addition to the positives, there were also many struggles. You know that “in sickness and in health” part? Yeah, lived through that. And all I can say is, one random yet life- changing day I woke up and realized I was not happy.
I have no plans to discuss my past but rather share the experiences of this new journey towards discovering my real self. What I will say is that I’m a gal who didn’t know what she wanted in life until she realized what she did not want. This ride is going to be fun. Overall, we had a great life together and though the marriage was short-lived, it was fulfilling and I don’t regret it for a second.
People often ask me, “Are you cynical and pessimistic about marriage now?” First of all, don’t ask a newly divorced girl that question. It’s condescending and rude. Most importantly, my answer is no. I believe in love and marriage more than ever before. I’m lucky enough to say that I am surrounded by beautiful relationships and marriages every single day. I’m not cynical…I’m a Charlotte. I believe in love. And shoes. And wine. And myself.