They say that a little romance goes a long way.
Old fashioned dating was all about romance. Opening doors, dating one person at a time, and the man always making the first move were all a part of the old-fashioned dating experience. But to be a modern woman or man, does one have to give up the romance to feel the love? Or can people still date the old-fashioned way?
We’ve all heard the stories of friends getting meeting their partner on dating apps, and statistics show that it is more likely for someone to meet their partner on a dating app then through mutual acquaintances. Meeting someone the old-fashioned way isn’t popular, but it can be a rewarding experience if you want a more intimate dating experience.
There are many modern daters who are getting tired of the lack of altruism and intimacy in their romantic relationships. Luckily, old fashioned dating is becoming “trendy” again, romance isn’t dead.
So, if you want an old-fashioned relationship, don’t give up hope! There are men willing to make the first move if you give them a nudge in your direction. It is SCARY for a man to make the first move these days, as many men aren’t sure about how a modern woman feels when it comes to a man taking charge. So, if you see a handsome man at your gym, give him a little smile.
Here’s five more tips on how to approach old fashioned dating in the modern world.
If you want to find a partner by trying old-fashioned dating, it takes commitment, patience, and time. Allow a man to pursue and court you. Old fashioned dating is intentional, romantic, and careful. Allow yourself to get to know your new man, and go looking around anywhere else. Old fashioned dating does NOT thrive on the premise that your partner is dispensable.
I know it is scary to only date one person at a time. But if you’re feeling like you need to rush things because; resist the urge. I KNOW that it is hard to be vulnerable with one person, but if you truly want to get to know the man in front of you, you need time and patience to do so.
Think about it this way; dating one man instead of multiple men allows you to focus on that one person and get to know him instead of dating multiple men at once. When you date more than one man, it can become a mess that you cannot keep track of.
It’s not wrong to date multiple people; it’s just difficult to really connect and consider someone as an eternal partner when you are also romantically giving yourself to someone else.
Avoid going to the bars- at least right away. If you really want to connect with your man and get to know him at a personal level, your communication needs to be genuine and deep. Big crowds, loud music and judgement-impairing substances don’t lay the foundation for a serious relationship. I know that alcohol can bring your guard down, but it can also cause you to say or do something that is embarrassing enough to cause your relationship to end too soon or your partner to think of you in a different light.
Old fashioned romance takes time; which means spending too much time and relying on your phone is just not the best idea. If you rely on your phone for everything, your relationship will suffer.
Think about this- by not allowing our phones to manipulate how we connect with someone; we can meet the right person organically. We can get to know someone without staring at our screen- we can connect organically and maintain our focus and control on our relationship.
If you are fully dependent on your smartphone; you will bring that into the relationship and it will be a huge problem. Please, please, PLEASE avoid texting your friends asking for advice on a date or staring at your phone for any other reason when focusing on connecting with your new man. When you are with your partner, only focus your time on them.
However, I must add that phones however can be GOOD for a relationship- so don’t write your phone out completely. Technology CAN be a positive or negative tool in any relationship, it just depends on how you use it.
Technology is a tool that is designed to make our lives easier- we can use our phones to separate or draw us closer to our partner.
Think about this; before cell phones people still called each other and talked on the phone for hours. We can still do the same thing today (plus so much more)! We can video chat with our partner, and send him messages like “How was work today handsome”. Communicating with your partner through the phone while you are not physically still with them is actually an old-fashioned dating ritual and can be very romantic.
The biggest form of betrayal in any relationship is not being truthful and therefore not showing respect in the relationship. When people are not truthful about their intentions and expectations, it can cause troubles within the relationship (and there’s a chance that the relationship won’t last).
Unfortunately modern dating can sometimes lack respect…in fact, it’s often a “trend” to be selfish and treat people and dispensable in romantic relationships. Awareness of your man’s needs and finding a man who will treat you with the same level of respect will allow the love between the two of you to flow a lot smoother.
Courting should NOT end when you finally connect with your life partner. Even after years of marriage, showing each other love and appreciation should never become a chore or be brushed off because you are too busy.
Romance doesn’t always involve grand gestures. Romance is also calling each other every day, bringing home your partner’s favorite drink, and even cuddling and watching a movie.
Even with kids and no babysitter, you can enjoy a date at home when your kids go to bed.
I get it- life can get busy. However, your relationship with your man should ALWAYS be important. Do not give up on giving and receiving backrubs, time together, bringing home surprises, and picking up the slack when the other partner is feeling down. Taking care of each other and putting each other’s needs before your own is how you can ensure that you will always be taken care of (and that your partner will also be happy enough to take care of you).
Lack of intimacy, respect, and romantic gestures can cause big issues within any relationship. To be happy in any romantic relationship, you need to become selfless for the other person and vice versa. That way, you can take care of each other and meet each other’s needs while continuing to build a deeper connection.