I need some lady advice in dealing with a lady who started out with me on good terms, and ended up sour.
Okay ‘D+T’, this guy needs our help:
Long story short, met this girl through her friend. Her friend is the leader bitch and the girl I liked was the follower. A lot of times, the girl I liked was often unhappy as her leader would put her in social situations that she was unhappy with (such as going into bars/clubs she did not like and hanging out with the wrong crowd type things). Despite all of this, she desperately wanted to be like her bitch friend, who seemed to be more in tune with her social surroundings. She viewed her as some sort of a role model, which annoyed the bitch friend secretly, but she kept her around as she followed her.
I decided to focus on the lesser girl and try to be her friend, and also show some affection. It worked…..at first. Maybe she was leading me on, maybe she wasn’t, but she seemed quite responsive when I asked and talked about her life, and would give her flowers, which usually guaranteed me a kiss and a super big hug each time.
The only reason she was responsive to me at first was because I got along with her bitch friend…..but that had a short time span as I started to not get along with her bitch friend (I don’t tolerate arrogant bitches). On top of that, she (through her bitch friend) suddenly got with the “in” crowd and started to act arrogantly, and I called her out on that one too. Shortly afterwards the girl I liked soon started to argue with me. I confronted her every day and I wasn’t subtle when I asked her how she felt and what her feelings were (since she was also uncomfortable being in that crowd), and it made her uncomfortable. She finally admitted to me that she preferred to bottle and repress her feelings as she was afraid it would come out and offend someone. We all know that repressing your feelings doesn’t really work out in the long run as they would manifest in other ways. One thing about me, I don’t like it when someone represses his or her feelings. If I feel someone is acting like that, I will confront and ask how the feel.
Well she finally told me to F*** off. Even though I wash harsh in asking about how she felt and telling her how I feel. This happened a few years ago now and even though for the most part I don’t think about it…..this time of year and the thought still kind of burns a little bit, especially now since her birthday is less than two weeks away and I would ideally like to wish her a happy birthday. I am a bit older than she is (6 year difference) and she was in her early 20s then, so I don’t know if that factors into her inexperience and emotional issues.
The question is: What do I do now? I was thinking of text messaging her bitch friend and saying “look, you and I don’t get along, and I accept that…..but I really do care about your best friend. I would like to wish her happy bday. I am not asking to be at her party, but it would be nice to talk to her again”.