I’ve always had this problem – I want to do everything. I’m glad I’m not the opposite – that I’m not bored with life in its myriad aspects – but I can also get very overwhelmed if I’m not careful. I’m never able to get really good at any one thing because I’m too busy being sort of good at a lot of things.
I do better when I’m multitasking. I think I have a hard time focusing on one thing intensely so I seem to work better bouncing from one thing to another. I have a million different jobs and I like it that way. The problem is when it comes down to focusing on being successful in one area, I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to compromise all the other things.
For example, I got my yoga teaching certification earlier this year. I’m starting to teach classes, but I don’t want to devote my life to it … because then how would I continue to be a backpacking guide, which I’m also doing? The problem with guiding is it is seasonal work, which is probably good, because otherwise I couldn’t focus enough on the book I wrote and the writing career I’m trying to build. In addition I just got a job stretching people as a flexologist – in my defense it’s loosely related to the yoga – and I still work waiting tables just to survive while I try to make the rest of it work.
See any kind of issue here?
There are so many things I love to do – I’m a definite adventurer. I like that about myself. On the other hand, I recognize that my reluctance to devote myself to any one thing does create a lack of stability in my life. I would like to make that beautiful chaos work in harmony with actually making sure that I can take care of myself and pay my bills.
I refuse to quash my inquisitive spirit. I know that I only thrive when I’m engaged in activities that inspire me. How, then, do I find the balance between adventure and industry, inspiration and practicality, spontaneity and gravity? I’d like to think that now, because I’m finally following my heart and true passions, success will find me. I hope that’s the case.
Hopefully I can learn to focus and hone my multitasking abilities in a way that is most productive and useful to me. I can’t bring myself to give up any of what I’m currently working on – it all fuels and inspires me in a different way. I’ve decided that if this is how I am, I have to accept it and learn how to use it to my advantage. It is possible to do it all – I just have to have the determination and willpower! I finally believe in myself and I’m going to make it happen.